Faith Building, Round One…
Has life ever sucker punched you? Me too! Has it ever hit you so hard that you were shaken for days, weeks, maybe years? Me too! That was my 2021. That year, I became well-educated on what it means to trust the Lord.
I had just spent the previous five days at church camp with 500+ teens. This trip was my first exposure to a large group since COVID-19 had flipped our world upside down. My whole family ended up sick a few days after we returned home. And my poor husband, who was the only one in our family who didn't go to camp, got it the worst. None of us had experienced Covid-19 before, and we thought it was just a simple cold. Unfortunately, we were very mistaken.
By day six, we were all extremely ill. None of us had the energy to move. It was definitely unlike any illness I had ever had. But my husband, Jamie, seemed to struggle more than the rest of the family. His breathing was labored, and his O2 dropped into the 70's. I was a mess. I was terrified. We contemplated taking him to the hospital but ultimately decided to keep him home.
Sadly, Jamie's health continued to deteriorate. His breathing became strenuous, and by day ten, I was an absolute wreck. He was so frail that he could not even stand to shower. I was so nervous that I had not slept in four days. I was incredibly fearful that I would make the wrong decision about the hospital and he would die. Luckily, we had a great group of friends and a fantastic doctor who rallied around us.
He was given a second round of medication and IV fluids and put on oxygen. And I was given a hefty dose of melatonin and Benadryl while a friend came and cared for us. It would not be until two years later that our practitioner communicated how concerned she had been about Jamie. She has a phenomenal poker face.
Finally, after three weeks of exhaustion, fatigue, and anxiety, we started to come back to the land of the living. But little did we know that this near-death experience was only the first of three that would befall us over the next 18 months.
The next few days were soul-shaking. We were embarking on our faith-growing journey through suffering. Thankfully, the Lord had consistently put Psalm 139 before me over the past three taxing weeks. He knew the looming trial and was preparing me for the battle. And trust me, I would need all the preparation I could get.
“Where can I go from Your Spirit?
Or where can I flee from Your presence?
8 If I ascend into heaven, You are there;
If I make my bed in [c]hell, behold, You are there.
9 If I take the wings of the morning,
And dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea,
10 Even there Your hand shall lead me,
And Your right hand shall hold me.
11 If I say, “Surely the darkness shall [d]fall on me,”
Even the night shall be light about me;
12 Indeed, the darkness [e]shall not hide from You,
But the night shines as the day;
The darkness and the light are both alike to You.”